Let's Try Some Good Manners

Are good manners important? Well we could have the quickest blog ever, say yes and be done with it; but I thought we may have a look at what we mean by “good manners” and how they can improve day to day life for everyone! For me, good manners are a way to show respect for others, whether it be friends, family, or a stranger we have just met. There is an argument to suggest that on a much broader level, the concept of care and consideration can help worldwide cooperation, and working together for the good of the planet. Wow that is really something to think about!

So, what are we really talking about? Well the obvious place to start is with saying please and thank you. Hardly world shattering, but these two little words can make such a difference. Also, how about “excuse me” instead of barging past someone, in the street, supermarket, office – wherever? We are all busy people, and sometimes rushing around, but let’s remember to think about others too.

One of my pet hates is people who try and queue jump, why do they do that? Nobody wants to stand waiting to pay for their groceries in a shop, but what makes some people think they can push in front of others and refuse to take their turn. The same thing applies on public transport, have you ever noticed how when the bus turns up there are people who are willing to push and bully their way to the front of the queue, with no thought for anyone else. There is room on the bus, the bus will not pull off and begin the journey until everyone is on board, so why do they do it? Wouldn’t life be so much nicer if we all thought about our companions? Let’s make sure that the people who get on the bus first are those who may need a little help. Perhaps the elderly gentleman who is not as firm on his feet as he once was, or the mother with a baby in a pushchair, let’s get them on safely first and then the rest of us can board without a fuss.

I was brought up in an era where good manners and helping others was considered the “norm”. Somewhere, along the way we seem to have lost that. Maybe it is the age we now live in. Politically, there were certainly some changes in the 1980’s. Margaret Thatcher, (Prime Minister 1979 – 1990), was focused for the rights of individuals. She made a speech in 1987 stating “They're casting their problem on society. And, you know, there is no such thing as society. There are individual men and women, and there are families.” But of course there is such a thing as society, it’s me and you and all the people around us. It is being an active part of society that helps us live by certain rules, like not dropping litter on our streets or in our parks – yes they are ours, they belong to all of us and we should all take a pride in keeping them in good condition for everyone to enjoy. If there is no society what have we got?

Basically, good manners are all about thinking of others. I heard an argument a couple of years ago that a man holding a door open for a woman was sexist. Well let’s not talk about a man or a woman, let’s talk about people. I think that a person holding a door open for another person is a lovely gesture. We should all be doing it! If, you are a bit worried about causing offence, you could always ask “would you like me to open the door for you?” I really don’t think that anyone can be offended by such a kind offer. This consideration should flow into all aspects of our lives. At work, home, or out enjoying ourselves – let’s be kind to each other. Even on the drive to or from work we can show consideration. Is there really any need for drivers to drive so close to the car in front or to blow their horns quite so often?

As a general rule to manners I would suggest if you wouldn’t say it or do it in front of your grandparents – then don’t say it or do it in front of anyone else! If we all treat other people with respect, and value our individual differences as well as our likenesses, maybe we can change things for the better. Come on let’s make good manners fashionable again!   

Take a look at the clip below, from 1953. Good manners haven't changed, even if we are less patronising these days!  

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